My Imagination

This one is a little off the wall. I've been having some really weird things just popping into my head and to give people a feeling for how odd it can be to be me sometimes, and also because I've dished it out to everybody else enough on this blog that its time I make fun of myself a little bit, I've decided to share.

Last week my wife and I are driving to some friends house. It is garage sale season so there are tons of signs out of people trying to drive traffic to their yard sales. It was earlier in the morning and I wasn't really firing on all cylinders. What cylinders were firing were being used to operate the car I was driving. We passed one that my wife read aloud, "G-Sale." Obviously short hand for "Garage Sale"

The image that immediately pops into my head is a lime green ranch house with a concrete driveway with chalk drawings being interrupted by cracks in the surface. A middle aged lady sitting behind a folding table that she and her friends had played bridge on the night before with a glass of iced tea and a visor she had laying around the house that she had never worn, but could never throw away because she was sure it would come in handy some day.

From her perch in the garage doorway she keeps a close eye on all of her items for purchase. All seemed normal at this point. Then things got a little twisted. Instead of monopoly games where the thymbol, the car, and the dog pieces are missing, sweaters that have lights in them, and a collection of micro-machines that have been fished from the noses of children the items are of a more organic nature.

Scattered across the driveway are a collection of men of varying sizes, shapes and colors. Each one though is wearing a long chain made of either gold or platinum ornamented with some kind of medallion. Some had bottles of malt liquor in there hands, some had cigars, and others kept grabbing at their crotch and repeatedly pulling up their pants because, even though they were wearing a belt, it was for decorative purposes only.

All of them were yelling, and blurting out phrases that would have been difficult to understand even if they weren't all talking at the same time. None of them were wearing shirts with sleeves and one even took his shirt off and began pointing out all of his scars from being shot and/or stabbed.

My age group is obviously not the demographic for such a sale but it just goes to show how things can get confused between generations. To my mother that "G" means garage. To me, in the early hours of my day, that "G" meant a person who spent their time on the streets, being "G"angsta. More commonly spelled gangster. I then couldn't help but wonder how it would look if anybody actually showed up to that "G-sale" looking to buy G's and not useless personal belongings that people no longer want.

My sister in Law uses these on her Blog. I figured I would give them a try, don't worry Jen I will return them when I'm finished.
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Also on another note of my mind running wild, I was doing laundry this afternoon and the fabric softener smelled so good that I began to wonder what it would taste like. Obviously we are told that drinking fabric softener would be a terrible idea, but what if somehow fabric softener tasted delicious and nobody bothered to taste it and find out.

I'm curious but not stupid. I will let someone else figure that one out for me. Also if anybody has ever come across something where it is general knowledge that it would be a bad idea to taste, but you were still curious; let me know. It would be comforting to know I'm not alone.

A little tease about my next couple posts...One will be about my Wife and how if you're going to the fair why she is the best person to go with. This may get delayed because she will probably get final editing rights. Also, on the subject of tasting things we shouldn't taste I want to tell a story about my friend Wendy who sampled some goods a Wilco. (For those of you who don't know Wilco is a farm supply store) Stay tuned.